The notary met with Shelby and Ebony yesterday and they both signed the guardianship papers. Mike will file them with the Walton County Court tomorrow. Basically it gives us custody of both of the kids and neither of them can just come get them when released. There will be a plan of transition - one that shows they are acting as responsible people and parents, working, secure and stable place to live and so forth. It's a huge relief. The worst thing that could happen is that the kids get put back into and exposed to the lifestyle they had prior to all of this.
I spoke to Shelby tonight. She feels relieved that Ebony signed the papers as well. Ebony called me yesterday, after the notary had left the jail, and had all kinds of questions and still had somewhat of a tone like "I don't want y'all stealing my kids." I'm pretty sure I raised my voice to him and just unloaded pretty much everything I wrote in my last blog, Dear Shelby. I think that provided him with some relief.
Mike and I got into it a little bit today. He now too knows exactly how I feel about everything - and how unhappy I am living here. He seems to have had a memory lapse and doesn't remember all of the conversations prior to today's. He was somewhat conciliatory, and said he will eventually help me find another place to live. While I'm unhappy, I wouldn't do anything to cause great stress on Ellie's or Emma's life. I will eventually find another place to live - preferably a two-bedroom that will allow me to take the kids at times and Mike to take the kids - kinda like a divorced couple with kids. This would be their primary residence though. I'm good with that, because they have awesome rooms I designed. ;) Mike is learning the ins and outs of parenting too. I still see myself as probably taking more of the lead in Emma's care than Ellie's, but as she gets older, he'll feel more confident in handling her.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Friday, January 3, 2014
Dear Shelby
I'm really mad at you right now. I've not said it out right until now, but right now, I just really hate every decision you've made, how your actions have changed so many lives and how selfish you still behave.
I hate my life right now. I closed on my condo last week. I got a check for $3,000 - more than what I was thinking I was going to get so I was thinking about taking a short getwaway or something - something to clear my head and hopefully get me motivated to this new life I've somewhat agreed to living. But no, it didn't work out that way. Instead, I'm having to use the money to pay for a well to be repaired in my ex-husband's house, so we can have some sort of water pressure. It's already odd enough that I hate living in a house that is no longer mine - nor will I ever consider it to be mine again; living with a man upstairs I was once married to, but for many reasons did not work out - and he has not changed a single bit, and in lots of cases has just become more and more self-involved (even to the point of not properly caring the upkeep on his own residence - which has now become my problem); the weirdness of being together in situations with him - all of that - it's not even like we're friends - we're not. It's so fucking uncomfortable. I hate it. I hate that I hate it and I hate that I can't just accept it and "try to make the best of it" as people have told me. I wish I could've just taken that money and paid six months rent on a little one-bedroom apartment in midtown and waited for Ebony to get out jail and come get the kids, because that's probably what's gonna end up happening anyway.
I hate living here. I hate not having a home. I hate that you did what you did. I hate that I feel the way I do. Just know that you're not the only one who feels like she's in prison.
Love,
Mom
PS
By the way, this is probably the best life your children have ever known and you, nor Ebony, will ever know, or truly appreciate that - and that makes me mad too.
I hate my life right now. I closed on my condo last week. I got a check for $3,000 - more than what I was thinking I was going to get so I was thinking about taking a short getwaway or something - something to clear my head and hopefully get me motivated to this new life I've somewhat agreed to living. But no, it didn't work out that way. Instead, I'm having to use the money to pay for a well to be repaired in my ex-husband's house, so we can have some sort of water pressure. It's already odd enough that I hate living in a house that is no longer mine - nor will I ever consider it to be mine again; living with a man upstairs I was once married to, but for many reasons did not work out - and he has not changed a single bit, and in lots of cases has just become more and more self-involved (even to the point of not properly caring the upkeep on his own residence - which has now become my problem); the weirdness of being together in situations with him - all of that - it's not even like we're friends - we're not. It's so fucking uncomfortable. I hate it. I hate that I hate it and I hate that I can't just accept it and "try to make the best of it" as people have told me. I wish I could've just taken that money and paid six months rent on a little one-bedroom apartment in midtown and waited for Ebony to get out jail and come get the kids, because that's probably what's gonna end up happening anyway.
I hate living here. I hate not having a home. I hate that you did what you did. I hate that I feel the way I do. Just know that you're not the only one who feels like she's in prison.
Love,
Mom
PS
By the way, this is probably the best life your children have ever known and you, nor Ebony, will ever know, or truly appreciate that - and that makes me mad too.
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Missing my life
Even though I truly love Ellie and Emma, I so miss my life. I miss living in Midtown. I miss doing what I wanted when I wanted to do it (as in not having someone dependent on me). I miss my crazy-ass relationship with Jay and our fun Saturdays. I miss my friends and walking to Piedmont park whenever I wanted.
Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful for Mike and his generosity and having us live here, but I still miss all that. But it is nice not having to pay rent. It's nice having all the cable channels I don't even have time to watch. It's nice to sit and watch two beautiful children grow and crack up at all of the funny things Ellie says and does.
I'm slowly getting my things put in place and trying to make this apartment my temporary home, but it's still sad at times.
Things I'm happy about:
1. Watching/hearing how Emma stops crying when she hears my voice because right now I'm the most important person in the world to her.
2. Taking care of Emma and watching her grow. She has just started smiling on her own and it's a damn cute smile.
3. Watching Ellie and laughing at how funny he his.
4. Ellie's hair (altho I am going to get it trimmed very soon - a good friend made a really cool suggestion for it and I think it might work).
5. Being with all of my pets again
6. Not having to pay regular monthly bills (mortgage/rent, utilities, cable, internet)
Things I truly miss:
1. My independence
2. Jay
3. My friends
4. The city
5. Getting anywhere ITP in about 20 minutes
Well, I know I'm behind in my blogging, but thought I'd post this short one. Heading to Knoxville tomorrow to finish Christmas with Shane and his kids. We'll be back Sunday.
Ciao!
Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful for Mike and his generosity and having us live here, but I still miss all that. But it is nice not having to pay rent. It's nice having all the cable channels I don't even have time to watch. It's nice to sit and watch two beautiful children grow and crack up at all of the funny things Ellie says and does.
I'm slowly getting my things put in place and trying to make this apartment my temporary home, but it's still sad at times.
Things I'm happy about:
1. Watching/hearing how Emma stops crying when she hears my voice because right now I'm the most important person in the world to her.
2. Taking care of Emma and watching her grow. She has just started smiling on her own and it's a damn cute smile.
3. Watching Ellie and laughing at how funny he his.
4. Ellie's hair (altho I am going to get it trimmed very soon - a good friend made a really cool suggestion for it and I think it might work).
5. Being with all of my pets again
6. Not having to pay regular monthly bills (mortgage/rent, utilities, cable, internet)
Things I truly miss:
1. My independence
2. Jay
3. My friends
4. The city
5. Getting anywhere ITP in about 20 minutes
Well, I know I'm behind in my blogging, but thought I'd post this short one. Heading to Knoxville tomorrow to finish Christmas with Shane and his kids. We'll be back Sunday.
Ciao!
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
One Day
One Day
One day I will learn I'm worth more than my daily self doubts
One day I will learn that I'm loved as much as I love
One day I will learn that my personality covers the majority of my cellulite
One day I will realize I mean more to others than they tell me
One day I will truly believe it
One day I will discover that I've actually made a positive difference in somebody's life
One day I will feel completely fulfilled
One day I will feel consumed by love and cherished by the person I'm in complete and total love with
One day I will not be jealous because I will realize that I am enough
One day I will stop living for the future and absorb the bliss that is today
One day I will love myself as much as I love the world and those in it
One day I will accept that today has to be that day, and I will be happy
One day I will learn I'm worth more than my daily self doubts
One day I will learn that I'm loved as much as I love
One day I will learn that my personality covers the majority of my cellulite
One day I will realize I mean more to others than they tell me
One day I will truly believe it
One day I will discover that I've actually made a positive difference in somebody's life
One day I will feel completely fulfilled
One day I will feel consumed by love and cherished by the person I'm in complete and total love with
One day I will not be jealous because I will realize that I am enough
One day I will stop living for the future and absorb the bliss that is today
One day I will love myself as much as I love the world and those in it
One day I will accept that today has to be that day, and I will be happy
Friday, December 6, 2013
They took the deals
I know I'm several blogs behind. I've been pretty busy lately and just haven't taken the time to write.
1. I'm no longer in LA
2. The baby was born on 11/22/2013 (7lbs, 1oz) - her name is Emma Kay Lynne Woodson
3. I about had a nervous breakdown when I learned Shelby was in the hospital - guess it was kind of like a culmination of events and the birth would mark the true end of one phase and the real beginning of another. I dunno, that's my self-psychoanalysis.
4. She is beautiful
5. I started a Tumblr log for Shelby and my goal is to make at least one post each day - that way when she gets out, she'll be able to see what the kids did each and every day. If you wanna keep up too, you can follow it at http://ellie-emma-world.tumblr.com/. I chose Tumblr because of the ease to post. They have such a great app and it's a solid site.
Me breaking down (I honestly forgot how to get dressed and couldn't find shoes to put on for about 30 minutes - it was pretty bad:
Baby Emma (she was born before I could get to the hospital):
So, yesterday, Shelby and Ebony went back to court. Remember last time, Ebony screwed everything up by rejecting the deal. I was able to go see him at Pitchess Detention Center before leaving California and talk to him about it. By the time I left, he said he would agree to deal. He also said he would agree to signing the guardianship papers. The former he did, the latter is still yet to be seen.
So, here are the deals that were finally offered by the DA and accepted by Shelby and Ebony.
Shelby - Charge: Assault. Four years in prison.
Ebony - Charge: Attempted Robbery. Two years in prison.
Now the way it'll play out is like this: Shelby will serve 85% of her sentence (which comes out to about three years and two months - including time already served) and Ebony will serve 50% of his sentence (which is about seven months, including the time already served). They will both be eligible for parole after serving the percentages of their time. Ebony got to serve at a 50% rate because they reduced the charge from Robbery to Attempted Robbery. Since I wasn't there yesterday, I don't know the reasoning behind the reduction in his charge. It is frustrating though.
Shelby is going to try and paroled in Georgia. I don't know if Ebony will do the same, or not. In order to parole in Georgia, each of them will have to petition the Georgia State Parole Board and ask that they accept them. I don't know the likelihood of it happening or not. I also do not know how long they will be on parole, but I assume it would be for the remaining part of their original full sentence.
The sentencing will take place on December 19th. Shelby's lawyer is asking the judge that Shelby be sent to the California Institution for Women, located in Corona. It will ultimately be up the Board of Corrections to where she gets sent. Ebony will serve his sentence in Pitchess Detention Center, which is north of LA and where he's currently incarcerated.
1. I'm no longer in LA
2. The baby was born on 11/22/2013 (7lbs, 1oz) - her name is Emma Kay Lynne Woodson
3. I about had a nervous breakdown when I learned Shelby was in the hospital - guess it was kind of like a culmination of events and the birth would mark the true end of one phase and the real beginning of another. I dunno, that's my self-psychoanalysis.
4. She is beautiful
5. I started a Tumblr log for Shelby and my goal is to make at least one post each day - that way when she gets out, she'll be able to see what the kids did each and every day. If you wanna keep up too, you can follow it at http://ellie-emma-world.tumblr.com/. I chose Tumblr because of the ease to post. They have such a great app and it's a solid site.
Me breaking down (I honestly forgot how to get dressed and couldn't find shoes to put on for about 30 minutes - it was pretty bad:
Baby Emma (she was born before I could get to the hospital):
So, yesterday, Shelby and Ebony went back to court. Remember last time, Ebony screwed everything up by rejecting the deal. I was able to go see him at Pitchess Detention Center before leaving California and talk to him about it. By the time I left, he said he would agree to deal. He also said he would agree to signing the guardianship papers. The former he did, the latter is still yet to be seen.
So, here are the deals that were finally offered by the DA and accepted by Shelby and Ebony.
Shelby - Charge: Assault. Four years in prison.
Ebony - Charge: Attempted Robbery. Two years in prison.
Now the way it'll play out is like this: Shelby will serve 85% of her sentence (which comes out to about three years and two months - including time already served) and Ebony will serve 50% of his sentence (which is about seven months, including the time already served). They will both be eligible for parole after serving the percentages of their time. Ebony got to serve at a 50% rate because they reduced the charge from Robbery to Attempted Robbery. Since I wasn't there yesterday, I don't know the reasoning behind the reduction in his charge. It is frustrating though.
Shelby is going to try and paroled in Georgia. I don't know if Ebony will do the same, or not. In order to parole in Georgia, each of them will have to petition the Georgia State Parole Board and ask that they accept them. I don't know the likelihood of it happening or not. I also do not know how long they will be on parole, but I assume it would be for the remaining part of their original full sentence.
The sentencing will take place on December 19th. Shelby's lawyer is asking the judge that Shelby be sent to the California Institution for Women, located in Corona. It will ultimately be up the Board of Corrections to where she gets sent. Ebony will serve his sentence in Pitchess Detention Center, which is north of LA and where he's currently incarcerated.
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